The Fruit of the Spirit: Self-control

Written By Melvin Jones

The last, and in my way of thinking, the most difficult characteristic of one who shows the qualities of the Holy Spirit is self-control. Why is it so difficult? It gets to the very heart of our being. It drives much of the rest of our behavior in Christ.

We generally see self-control used in terms of physical actions. A person can lose weight if they just have enough self-control. After all, weight control is usually just a matter of eating less and being more active. And given normal circumstances, both of these can be accomplished with self-control. The greatest pianist in the world may have some genetics helping him out, unless he has the self-control to practice everyday he will never reach the full potential of his talent.

And while there is certainly this aspect of self-control in the Christian's life (it does take discipline to get up a 5 o'clock in the morning in the middle of winter to pray for someone when you would much rather stay under the nice warm electric blanket), it is not primarily physical self-control we are speaking of. God, as usual, has made this aspect of living the Christian life something we cannot do on our own.

In Matthew chapter five, verse 28 Jesus said: I say unto you, that whosoever looks on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart (Matthew 5:28).

When you talk to the unsaved about Christianity, one of their first lines of defense is: Well, I haven't ever killed anybody, or cheated on my wife. This of course implies they haven't done anything wrong to need saving from. But the Bible makes it clear in Matthew that sin is a matter of controlling the heart, not just controlling the body.

When I allow myself to hate a brother in Christ I am guilty of murder (1 John 3:15). I have done nothing to him physically, but according to the Bible, I am guilty of murder and am in violation of one of the Ten Commandments.

Self-control is that quality of my walk with God that allows me to pray for those who would persecute me, even within the church. It urges me to fulfill my responsibilities as a husband and a father. It means that I will give my best effort at work whether I like my boss or think she is the worst ogre to spoil the face of the earth.

Self-control provides us with the desire and the will to respond in love rather than selfish anger. It provides us with the willingness to listen to the other person before reacting. And it makes sure that when we do react, we react in love, not out of a desire to hurt or punish.

Romans chapter 12 commands us to bless those who persecute us. How can we do this in our own strength? Sometimes it is difficult to just thank those who have done something for us. Here God tells us we must bless those who persecute us. With God's spirit molding and shaping us, this behavior becomes more of a natural response.

I may still not want to get up on a cold morning to pray for someone I don't particularly like, but at least the reason for not wanting to get up will be because I want to be comfortable, not because I don't care about the person. And ultimately, I will get up.